- Joined
- Jan 4, 2020
- Messages
- 2
I was sexually assaulted by a TM outside of work. I didn’t want to report it for a long time and even continued being friends with/talking to the TM. It took me a while to process what had happened, but I always knew it was wrong I just didn’t know what to do.
I began reaching out for help early. Days after it happened I asked a TL about OnSite Resources and asked hypothetically if I told them something happened with another TM would they be obliged to report (I didn’t want them to). I didn’t get a straight answer. Next, I told an ETL and asked him what I could do about the situation but they didn’t offer me much. Then, I went to someone in HR (not our head HR) and asked them as well if they knew what could be done. Nothing. All this time I had been avoiding the police/going to the head of HR because I wasn’t sure if I wanted to report. I had little to no evidence and a lot going against me (staying friends with the TM etc), and I didn’t want to be badgered/re-traumatized in any kind of investigation process.
Eventually, I had been told by a TM who knew what happened that I needed to speak to another TM (insinuating it had happened to them as well). I spoke to the them and realized this was a pattern. The TM in question used the workplace as a hunting ground, but only did what he knew he could get away with (mostly outside of work), but no one had ever come forward. I was new to the store, so I never knew about the past behaviors of the TM who assaulted me. The TM I spoke to convinced me that speaking to the head of HR might be the best course of action. So I decided to suck it up and do it. Big mistake. An investigation was started on my behalf, but I found out the other TM had also started their own investigation once they were questioned claiming I’m some sort of threat to them. They brought in their own (bullshit) evidence to create their own narrative. Now it’s a big possibility I might be the one getting fired.
When I talk to HR they tell me his past behavior is irrelevant unless someone else wants to come forward about it, which I would never ask them to do. I realized HR was not on my side. They’re not there to protect me, they’re there to protect the company, and taking his side looks better on the company. I had a panic attack sitting in the office realizing everything was being turned on me. Even if I were to “win” the investigation and he were to be fired I don’t know if I’d feel comfortable working in that building anymore. Some friends have told me to quit and some have told me to fight it. I know it’d look bad, but I feel like just rolling over at this point. I can’t have them pulling me aside in the middle of my shifts to accuse me of threatening someone who I came to them and told them assaulted me, I had to leave early the last time because it was just too much. I’m leaning towards just quitting but will that automatically stop the investigation? Won’t it be a waste of resources to investigate someone who won’t be there anymore? I don’t know if I should quit on the spot or put in my two weeks. Any help would be appreciated.
I began reaching out for help early. Days after it happened I asked a TL about OnSite Resources and asked hypothetically if I told them something happened with another TM would they be obliged to report (I didn’t want them to). I didn’t get a straight answer. Next, I told an ETL and asked him what I could do about the situation but they didn’t offer me much. Then, I went to someone in HR (not our head HR) and asked them as well if they knew what could be done. Nothing. All this time I had been avoiding the police/going to the head of HR because I wasn’t sure if I wanted to report. I had little to no evidence and a lot going against me (staying friends with the TM etc), and I didn’t want to be badgered/re-traumatized in any kind of investigation process.
Eventually, I had been told by a TM who knew what happened that I needed to speak to another TM (insinuating it had happened to them as well). I spoke to the them and realized this was a pattern. The TM in question used the workplace as a hunting ground, but only did what he knew he could get away with (mostly outside of work), but no one had ever come forward. I was new to the store, so I never knew about the past behaviors of the TM who assaulted me. The TM I spoke to convinced me that speaking to the head of HR might be the best course of action. So I decided to suck it up and do it. Big mistake. An investigation was started on my behalf, but I found out the other TM had also started their own investigation once they were questioned claiming I’m some sort of threat to them. They brought in their own (bullshit) evidence to create their own narrative. Now it’s a big possibility I might be the one getting fired.
When I talk to HR they tell me his past behavior is irrelevant unless someone else wants to come forward about it, which I would never ask them to do. I realized HR was not on my side. They’re not there to protect me, they’re there to protect the company, and taking his side looks better on the company. I had a panic attack sitting in the office realizing everything was being turned on me. Even if I were to “win” the investigation and he were to be fired I don’t know if I’d feel comfortable working in that building anymore. Some friends have told me to quit and some have told me to fight it. I know it’d look bad, but I feel like just rolling over at this point. I can’t have them pulling me aside in the middle of my shifts to accuse me of threatening someone who I came to them and told them assaulted me, I had to leave early the last time because it was just too much. I’m leaning towards just quitting but will that automatically stop the investigation? Won’t it be a waste of resources to investigate someone who won’t be there anymore? I don’t know if I should quit on the spot or put in my two weeks. Any help would be appreciated.