Archived ETL is a jerk.

[redeye58]

my father is on his way out and I'll be wreck when that day comes.

Having lost my dad, I know that ache.
Keeping you in thoughts & prayers as his time approaches.

It was a hard time for us, and her presence wasn't welcome.

That's what ushers are for.

 

[ptl]

My brother in law's HR showed up at our father's funeral. She didn't know our father, and we didn't need her there. She wasn't a personal friend. Almost felt like she only came to make sure all the time taken off for his illness was for real.

I say express condolences, send flowers or a card, but unless you personally knew the deceased, don't go to the funeral.

Just my opinion.

It's awesome that empathy is seen as devious by some. God forbid we think people are nice at their core.

I'm not saying you're wrong about how TOT saw it--I'm not him, after all--but I can say that I would feel the same way as him about someone from work being at a funeral or wake for one of my relatives, and not because I saw it as devious or disingenuous or anything like that. They just simply aren't a part of my life in that way. The last thing I would want to think about in that situation is work, and having people from work there (even though they had nothing but the best intentions) would not help me in any way.

(Yes, I do have a couple of friends at work about whom I would not feel this way. The difference is that they are "friends I work with" as opposed to "coworkers with whom I am friendly"--the category 99% of the team falls into.)

 

[SomeBodysSlave]

What about siblings and cousins? 🙂

Screw em --

 

[mrknownothing]

When my Dad died, no one from Target was at the wake/visitation or funeral. No condolences/card/flowers were given to me, either.

Well, maybe an ETL or two and a TL said offered their condolences.

Wow. My store goes crazy with cards and whatnot anytime a TM is ill/injured/grief-stricken. We had a TM die several months ago and most of the leadership made it to the wake. Only one went to the funeral though because she was family. HR got a card for everyone to sign and sent it to his wife and children.

 

[Softlines Owns My Soul]

We have an older team member at our store and once they got sick and had to be hospitalized. No one from Target went to visit except for me (a TM). I felt awful that no one else cared. But I guess that's what you have to expect. They don't care about you.

 

[TargetOldTimer]

I'm not saying you're wrong about how TOT saw it--I'm not him, after all--but I can say that I would feel the same way as him about someone from work being at a funeral or wake for one of my relatives, and not because I saw it as devious or disingenuous or anything like that. They just simply aren't a part of my life in that way. The last thing I would want to think about in that situation is work, and having people from work there (even though they had nothing but the best intentions) would not help me in any way.

(Yes, I do have a couple of friends at work about whom I would not feel this way. The difference is that they are "friends I work with" as opposed to "coworkers with whom I am friendly"--the category 99% of the team falls into.)

You said it much better than I.


BTW, I'm a she. 🙂)

 

[lovecats]

When my father-in-law died I not only got a card and a hug from my etl-hr, when I got back to work I came home one night and they had sent flowers. Made me cry all over again. They were extremely supportive.

 

[pzychopopgroove]

Have you been to my store?

Our store is visited by the FBI at least once a year.

What the ****?

 

[TargetOldTimer]

When my father-in-law died I not only got a card and a hug from my etl-hr, when I got back to work I came home one night and they had sent flowers. Made me cry all over again. They were extremely supportive.

Now that is absolutely the best response to a tm loss. You are very lucky to work in such a caring store.

 

[lovecats]

Now that is absolutely the best response to a tm loss. You are very lucky to work in such a caring store.

I didn't say that my etl-hr also told me when I got back that if I needed to step away from the register just to let them know. I worked at Kohles a couple of years before that when my sister-in-law and my mother died within 2 weeks of each other and while they were symphathetic I only got a card from one of the other employees tacked to the bulletin board in the back.

 

[stupid rules]

I wouldn't have went to the funeral and I wouldn't want anyone from work coming to a funeral for someone in my family.

 

[backroomcrew]

Losing a child must be so hard. The Stl and hr went to show support and that was nice, but I don't think that team lead would think about any ETL for a second that day.... They must be too caught up in grief.
Hopefully that ETL will show support to the TL hardship when they return. For such Personal loss, I think it would be hard for me to see my target leaders there when maybe all I would want is family. It's hard to say until you are in the moment. I've had some funerals where I wanted just family and for everyone to shut up and others where I wondered why someone wasnt talking about/ consumed by the thought of this person as much as I was, when I found it hard to keep her name off my lips and just wanted someone else to mention it too.