Archived Go Out With A BANG!

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StateofTarget said:
*An ETL that was scheduled to close walked out of the store and never told anyone. Eventually it came time to close and no one could find him. Someone eventually found a letter taped to the STLs office that said "I'm sorry, I just can't take this ************ job anymore. I didn't go to college for this" and his keys were on the ground in front of the door. We ended up having to get the DTL out to the store at close to midnight. (we were lucky as hell a TL happened to have our DTLs phone number.... because no one knew how to get in touch with any ETL)
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Just wondering, if this was to happen would it still not be okay to use said exec's keys now laying on the floor to lock the doors yourself as a closing TL or other higher up/trust worthy person... I still understand there are other closing activities to be completed, but, as far as locking the doors?
 
Wow, I am very impressed with your responses and as promised, here are a few things I would do. I would naturally want a closing shift as my last shift, and so here is a few options I have considered:

1. LOCU a few of my favorite aisles that were such a joy to backstock (Shoes, Women's, Men's, etc... basically all of softlines, and then a few locations in steel)
2. Not sure I would cuss out any of my ETL's or LOD's, cause I don't really have a beef with any of them (well except my ETL-LOG), but I would want to have an interaction with a unruly guest, so I could tell them off.
3. At about 15-20 minutes prior to closing, I would make my own little closing announcement on the overhead microphone, which would go something like " Dear Customers...oops I mean guests, it is about 15 minutes til' closing, which basically means you need to get your $h!t and get the hell out. Did you get your milk, eggs, bread, sugary sweets. Did you remember to get your condoms? I see you over there, you don't need Magnum, use the trusted brand. Well as this is my last day, I want to tell all the guests, that you can suck it, and for our listening pleasure, here is "Totally F***ked" by the cast of Spring Awkaening, there might be some words in their you might recognize. Oh and before I forget, we will be open from 8 am until 10 pm for your connivence , have a nice night", yea that sounds good to me lol
 
Not I would do this.
Here goes:
1. Throw magnetic keys to the top of or in the baler.
2. Put super glue on the time clock buttons.
3. Throw ca remote & keys to the roof of the building(this really happened).
4. Disconnect all battery cables on waves or crowns in the backroom.
5. Hide the mice on the tsc computers.
Still thinking...
 
Call in an Air S
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Some of these are pretty funny. The problem is that most of them just leave your coworkers to clean up the mess. Who do you think is going to fix the backroom locations or clean up trash? I feel the same way when TMs just walk out. It doesn't hurt Target or the ETL you may have a beef with it just plops the burden on the people that have been in the trenches with you. However if you are working with some jerks......But the dude with the walkie, now that was classic.
 
redeye58 said:
Not that I'd ever DO this, but....

-Reprogram all the call buttons to include various depts we don't even have
-Do a "close registers" function early in the AM so they'll have to re-open all of them
-Hide the indyme restroom buttons
-Fill the mop bucket on the CA cart with a mix of Axe body wash & a fruit-scented soap so every mop-up reeks
-Fill the cart lanes inside so it blocks the exit (but not the entrance)
-Shoot the LARGEST EXF in corp history, resulting in a train of tubs along the front end
-Replace the restroom air fresheners with the most revolting, cheap cologne so it smells like a Turkish den of ill repute
-Take the overhead mike, lock it in the "on" position next to a jam box playing gangsta rap

...to name a few.
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You sound like my future partner in crime!
 
JamesJimJam said:
A Team Member at our store ran as fast as he could with a cart and rammed it into One Spot then walked out.
Having to pick up a giant pile of cheap plastic items wasn't the highlight of my day.
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Reminds me when i broke the door with the cart pusher back in march lol
 
StateofTarget said:
In my time with Target I have seen the following happen:

*A TM walked in to food ave, took off his shirt (topless), threw it at a table of guests, screamed like a nut case at everyone, and ran out the door. We never saw him again.

*A TM got on the intercom using the red phone extension and cussed ETLs out over the intercom. This went on for a good 15 minutes because he was going around the store from red phone to red phone so no one could figure out where he was. Eventually we heard a fire alarm go off. He ditched out of the store through the backroom fire exit.

*A TM stole a walkie and hid outside the store. He cussed everyone out on the walkie. (this was a huge problem because guests heard all of this across the store) It totally disrupted the store because no one could use the walkies at all. The guy didn't give up after the first day though. He did this again for an entire week. AP could not find him in the parking lot. Eventually we figured he was hiding in the store next to ours. No one ever caught him, and eventually he stopped... probably once the battery died.

*An ETL that was scheduled to close walked out of the store and never told anyone. Eventually it came time to close and no one could find him. Someone eventually found a letter taped to the STLs office that said "I'm sorry, I just can't take this ************ job anymore. I didn't go to college for this" and his keys were on the ground in front of the door. We ended up having to get the DTL out to the store at close to midnight. (we were lucky as hell a TL happened to have our DTLs phone number.... because no one knew how to get in touch with any ETL)

Probably lots more than I am forgetting.
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When you can remember, PLEASE TELL! I am DYING laughing here!
 
lol sometimes ill take the keys to the Quickart while the CA is on break (we're friends).

Then I'll get a call on the walkie in a little bit:

"GSTL??"
"Go ahead for GSA"
"4??"
"4"
"Dude, someone took the keys to the cart pusher!!"

proceed to mess with him a bit then give him the keys back 😀 lol
 
Imerzan said:
lol sometimes ill take the keys to the Quickart while the CA is on break (we're friends).

Then I'll get a call on the walkie in a little bit:

"GSTL??"
"Go ahead for GSA"
"4??"
"4"
"Dude, someone took the keys to the cart pusher!!"

proceed to mess with him a bit then give him the keys back 😀 lol
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If the GSTL's weren't too busy helping guests they'd have done the EXACT same thing to me.
 
I would organize a flash mob

Do the closing announcements early or how I didn't them the first time "than you for calling the super target this is my name here can I help you find something? ....hello?!"

I would unfold every towel
Break every tie in domestics and tie it into Locations that don't really exsist in our store (I have h30-60 availible for tables in rtw)
Go over to girls and infants tie everything into the same location
Change all the clearance signs to 70% off in domestics and infants (I dislike the team leads over there they have sucky attitudes and work ethics)
Wear someone else's name tag and ignore guests, yell at guests and occasionally burst out into tears asking them why Wont you people leave me alone?

Drop an exf for Mmb all for things that are filled
Tell the gstl that I forgot how to do her job so I can't cover her break and continue to insist I never have gotten training
Tell off the annoying GSA who wanted my job but instead got a possition with lots of responsibility no power and little pay...so almost just like my job but I get better hours
Pull a prank on he only boy on my team and have every girl hit on him
 
This thread is so hilarious. I was going to start one on Friday very similar to this but then changed my mind and this one popped up. Sunday is actually my last day with spot. I have another job: better pay, better hours, less responsibility, no etl's, no fighting for hours, no business walks, no TL meetings getting nowhere, need I go on? Thanks for all the ideas but I probably won't do anything but walk out with my pride.
 
I was an ETL-Hardlines and had many visions of ways to screw my STL and ETL-Merch when I left. In the end I did nothing except walk out the door with my pride intact. They were continually finding ways to screw me so I refused to drop to their level and left the better person.
 
WannaBthebestTL said:
I probably won't do anything but walk out with my pride.
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bikebryan said:
I was an ETL-Hardlines and had many visions of ways to screw my STL and ETL-Merch when I left. In the end I did nothing except walk out the door with my pride intact. They were continually finding ways to screw me so I refused to drop to their level and left the better person.
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Good for you two!
 
Well on my last night at target I left a nasty little note in the AP communication book to the ignorant b*tch ETL-AP and the stupid APS telling them both off. And in the pockets of the AP uniform I had to turn in I left little notes saying "Target sucks" and "ETL-AP is a b*tch" and so on.... yeah nothing that great but i got my dig in... haha oh well
 
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