Archived Guests Say the Darndest Things...

[3LetterDevil]

They wanted to make a dani sandwich.

Or a "Dani does the Deli" movie. Bowchickawowwow!!

 

[masterofalltrades]

So last night i had this elederly lady walk up to me, and nonchalantly ask loudly if we carried water works douche. Everyone was staring. As it turns out we don't carrythat one

 

[TargetHEEL]

Older lady was interested in an MP3 player. On the box it says "carries 200 songs."

Lady: "So this carries 200 songs?"
Me: "Yes ma'am."
Lady: "So the songs are already on there?"
Me: *internal facepalm*

 

[Kartman]

That stuff derps me out...

 

[TallAPGuy]

I posted this somewhere else, but I asked a little old lady, looking at vitamins, if she needed help finding anything and she turned to me and, without missing a beat, replied: "Yes, where do you folks keep the rectal hemorrhoidal cream?"
"Ah, um...right over there, mam," and I turned around and watched cameras for the rest of the afternoon.

 

[NPC]

I posted this somewhere else, but I asked a little old lady, looking at vitamins, if she needed help finding anything and she turned to me and, without missing a beat, replied: "Yes, where do you folks keep the rectal hemorrhoidal cream?"
"Ah, um...right over there, mam," and I turned around and watched cameras for the rest of the afternoon.

LMAO, once someone asked me where the Enemas were. At the time I didn't know what those where, so he laughed and said, "Well obviously you don't ever use them apparently." I was pretty embarrassed when I found out what they were.

 

[taursea]

I once had a woman come to my lane towing about 6 kids behind her, all under the age of ten. She was unloading her stuff onto my belt when one of the little kids was showing her a toy, asking for it, etc. and being very persistent (normal for a kid her age, maybe 3). Then the mom just squats down and grabs the girl's hands and goes, "Estelle? I'm gonna need you to come back to reality with me for a minute, okay?" it was like something off Intervention.

 

[redeye58]

"Estelle? I'm gonna need you to come back to reality with me for a minute, okay?"

Could've said that to any number of the kids I worked with. lol

 

[SFSFun]

I had a guest ambush me at the entrance as I was walking back from break (the entrance on the other side of the store from guest services). He handed me a piece of paper with a DPCI on it and asked me to pull 2 from the back.

I thought it was odd that he knew we had some in the back, but stranger things have happened. I went back there, grabbed my PDA, and went to pull the item...and no backroom locations. Item search showed two on hand so I went across the store to check the salesfloor loc... Nothing there, don't see it flexed out anywhere in the department.

I went back up front and informed the guest that we don't seem to have any and he went apeshit crazy, yelling about how he drove from the next county over because he called and someone had told him they would hold it for him up front.

"Um sir, did you go to guest services yet? Any items on hold will be up there with your name on it."

And of course that's exactly where it was...