To that one guest

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No specific gripe today. Just sharing a fantasy.

Whenever I'm dealing with a terrible guest, whom is clearly oblivious to how their existence is a total waste, and they're being awful people.....I fantasize about slitting my throat, and spraying them with blood, like we're in a Tarantino movie, just to horrify them and show them that they're SUCH a terrible person, they made someone slice open their throat.

And just a disclaimer for the sensitive, I would never do such a thing, blah blah blah, lighten up. 🙄
 
To that one guest who wanted a particular shoe, I'm sorry you only found one shoe from the online return but there is NO WAY I can make the other shoe appear. No we didn't take back one shoe! I did look for the shoe but being a b-tch doesn't make me want to look too hard! Try being nice next time!
 
Cashiering and you came up to me with your kids, husband, and a cart full of merchandise. I go to scan a Serta blowup mattress with clearance stickers stuck over the barcode (never seen that before). They said $13.98 but I scanned the barcode and the mattress came up $120.99. I didn't even check the clearance DPCI, grabbed the GSA and you didn't make eye contact with either of us while the GSA told you the thing wasn't on clearance. GSA and I check the clearance DPCI and it's for a children's play mat. I don't know if someone else switched the tickets or you did, but if it was you, nice try.
 
To that one guest that asked me where she could find maxi skirts: I told you exactly where you could find them. You then replied with "I was over there earlier and didn't see any, can you call someone?," all while bringing your hand up to your ear as if you were calling someone on the phone which made no sense to me. Who else can I fucking call when I'm the Fitting Room attendant? I look around and see the TL and ask her, she tells me exactly what I told you earlier, so I repeat that to you and then you still ask me :".....and WHO told you that?" I replied with "the team lead" and I admit it was in a rather snappy tone, but do I feel bad about it? No. Do I give a shit if you decide to complain about me? Not at all. I'm really so done with retail.
 
My coworker and I are working on picking ship from store orders off the sales floor. We are walking past the fitting room. It's early in the morning, so the FRO is putting out some reshop in another area and a guest is standing by the counter.

Guest: Are either of you working in this area?
Me: No...
Guest: I've been standing here for 20 minutes! There's no one here. I need HELP!
Me (looks around and sees my SLTL maybe a foot or two away, confused) What do you need help with?
Guest: I NEED a fitting room!
Me: (glances down hallway, maybe one door is closed, rest are open and available) So go take one?
Guest walks away all huffy.

I swear some people just look to start arguments.

(Goes up to help cashier when the registers are only accepting credit or cash yesterday, everyone is on a lane, tentatively trying to ring up guests, of course there are huge lines)
I look up to take next guest and sheepishly ask how she is (guests are getting pissed at this point and my ETL-GE is sweating bullets)
Guest: (blank stare)
I ring up her items and she hands me two gift cards. I know they won't work, but do it to humor the guest. Screen says cards have nothing on them which we know isn't true.
Me: I'm sorry it's not going to take these today.
Guest: (broken English) so there's nothing on these? There's $5 on each!
Me: No, there's money on there, our registers are having issues today.
Guest continues to state there is money on her gift cards.
Me: Our registers are broken, they don't work...
Guest is still confused. Then in broken English she yells about how inconvenient this is.

Ugh. Luckily most of our guests were patient and/or didn't take out their frustrations on us poor peons.
 
TTOG with your kids and mother: You were telling me how nice our weekday opening cashier is and that all our cashiers are nice. Then you told me that there was one cashier you got fired during Christmas last year by calling corporate on him. You said a situation occurred and what our cashier and manager did was ridiculous. First I've worked at my store a year and a half and don't recall anyone being fired with one exception but it wasn't the person you were describing. Second of all, if the incident you were describing did happen, yes, the cashier shoulda been disciplined, but maybe not fired. Finally, when your mother said "maybe this isn't a story you want to be sharing with everyone," LISTEN TO HER. ugh.
 
TTOG: screw you and your screaming children. I know I don't have a "10 items or less" sign at my SD. That doesn't mean you can being a cart full of crap and then argue every damn clearance price, and split it it into three transactions, and try and argue that because your have your email you can pick up a flex order without ID, and then get mad when I help other guests with their returns and answer the phone (which I can't hear because of the aforementioned screaming kids) and then get mad that I wouldn't personally leave my desk with a five deep line to do your carry out. Get bent.

To my awesome cat attendant. You rock man. Thanks for picking up so much slack on front end even though you're already busy.
 
TTOM(To That One Mother) Please for the love of god, stop your crotch dropping who was having a tantrum and throwing food and pissing off everyone in Sbux/FA who had to get pelted with food. Including me who told her that a good ass whoopin was needed and it wasn't him who needed it more.. I don't take to being hit with a bit of Pretzel nicely.

I knew I shouldn't have stopped on my way out for that frap from Sbux.. But it tasted good while sitting in traffic.
 
To that one (group of) guest(s):

You came to my register with a large item in a cart. I rang it up and it was $49.99
You said no, it's on sale for $29.99
I said, okay, is that maybe with a coupon or cartwheel?
No, the sign back there says $29.99. There's a sign. We're not making it up, there is a sign that clearly says $29.99.
I say, okay, let me get my team leader for a price check.
No, we saw it, it's $29.99, there's a sign and this (item) was right under it!
I say, no problem, I'm sure there is but I can't make a $20.00 discount (mostly because they were babbling on incessantly about the goddamned price and being impatient dicks)
FINALLY ... LOD calls for a price check and it seems we had an outdated sign but we gave them the advertised price from last week.
They were smug and assholey. I mean, jesus, we're a business. We can't discount everything 20 bucks every time someone makes a challenge. Scammers would hit us up every day.
You were just fucking snotty entitled assholes.
 
Frontlanegirl said:
Maybe God should have thought twice with "blessing" them with those kids. He would have done us all a favor. BTW...I am agnostic. hehe
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To you end all your jokes with disclaimers like that?

"Why did the chicken cross the road?"
"I dunno."
"To get to the other side! I'm vegan by the way. heehee!"
stanley-woman-literally-loses-her-sh-t-while-seeing-fifty-shades-of-grey-gif-283507.gif
 
TTOG: you couldn't be bothered to ask the friend you were talking on the phone with to hold while you picked up your rx, so I made sure to ask you every possible question I could think of to interrupt your call. i initially just stood there and waited, thinking you'd get the point, even told you I couldn't help you while you were on the phone, but you kept taking it away from your ear to talk to me, then putting it back and apologizing to your FRIEND because "the pharmacy girl keeps asking me questions..." Even when I told you I was just doing my job and it would be over a lot quicker if you'd ask your friend to hold for just a moment," you didn't get the hint," so I decided to be as annoying as possible. What could've taken 2-3 minutes took approx 7-8 😎
 
TTOG: No, I really had no idea what time the pharmacist would get back from lunch. Normally they leave a note up, but for whatever reason they didn't today. And you heard the response I got over the walkie: No one knows what time they'll be back because they don't report to Target anymore.
Don't tell me "I'm not sorry enough to find out" What more could you possibly want? I did everything in my power to find the answer for you, there was literally nothing more I could have done!
 
TallAPGuy said:
TTOG: No, I really had no idea what time the pharmacist would get back from lunch. Normally they leave a note up, but for whatever reason they didn't today. And you heard the response I got over the walkie: No one knows what time they'll be back because they don't report to Target anymore.
Don't tell me "I'm not sorry enough to find out" What more could you possibly want? I did everything in my power to find the answer for you, there was literally nothing more I could have done!
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It should still be from 1:30-2....at least that's what our signs still say. We were told we can still dispense while they are at lunch, though, because they are still in the building, and as salaried employees, "technically" still "on duty."
 
PharmaQueen said:
It should still be from 1:30-2....at least that's what our signs still say. We were told we can still dispense while they are at lunch, though, because they are still in the building, and as salaried employees, "technically" still "on duty."
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It looked like it was only the pharmacist after noon, no techs, and he got back at 3:15.
Do all CVS pharmacies only have temp pharmacists now? We never have the same pharmacist for more than a week.
 
TallAPGuy said:
It looked like it was only the pharmacist after noon, no techs, and he got back at 3:15.
Do all CVS pharmacies only have temp pharmacists now? We never have the same pharmacist for more than a week.
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No, legally, there has to be a pharmacy manager on paper, but AFA a staff pharmacist, some only have floaters. During the summer, you usually see a lot of floaters because of vacations and the way CVS vacation policy is for pharmacists, they have to take it in larger increments than they could with Target. I think they have to take a minimum of 1-2 weeks at a time...
 
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