Archived Things you wish you could do/say....

Status
Not open for further replies.
"You know, I'm going as fast as humanely possible to get you through the registers... GLARING AT ME and sighing and whispering to your friend is NOT going to make me go any faster."

Or

"You want to sigh and huff and puff like you're two?? Go check out the lines in any other store... and SHUT UP."
 
To the 300 pound shopper riding on her Hoveround, heaving and sweating at the Starbucks counter: "No, you don't NEED that Venti Mocha Cookie Crumble Frappuccino with extra chips, extra mocha, extra vanilla, and extra whip. Get off your ass and walk, at least to the table."

And to the young mom giddily texting on her cell phone as her children rearrange the drinks in the case at Starbucks, pull napkins out of the dispensers and throw them on the ground, and toss bags of coffee beans at one another: "Really???"
 
wageslave1138 said:
To the parents with their "uncontrollable" kids, or as I like say "posterchildren for birth control", I really want to drop a box of condoms in their cart when they are trying to round up their brats. Big box...
Click to expand...

At least they try to round up their brats....at my store they usually just let them continue :dash2:

To the mom who walked around the store yesterday for a good 20 minutes with her approx. 6 month old baby SCREAMING at the top of her lungs the ENTIRE time: GET OFF YOUR DAMN PHONE AND TAKE CARE OF YOUR CHILD!!! No, she's not just "finding her voice", that's a "I'm tired/hungry/wet/poopy/something's DEFINITELY wrong" cry. People like you should NOT be allowed to procreate!!! How on earth could you even hear to talk on the phone with her screaming like that?
 
researchr said:
To the mom dragging her 10? year old daughter out of the store because she had misbehaved and was now having a full blown temper tantrum..I wanted to say "Good for you"..but I was afraid to..
Click to expand...
I would've applauded.
 
To the guests who give their kid a $20 bill (or larger) and come to Food Ave, buy a small ICEE with it, let me put the lid on the cup, run off without the change, go to the ICEE machine, take the lid off, fill the cup up all the way to the top, let it spew all over the counter, the floor, their clothes, a table, and the chip racks in front of the register, then run over to Starbucks without the lid on it making a mess all the way across the store, leaving me to get b*****d at by the CA, Food TL, an ETL or 2, the moron's parents, and other guests:

"**** YOU AND YOUR STUPID KID!"

I hate people that don't parent.

Parent your kids, folks.

themoreyouknow.jpg
 
There is a lady who is stuck back in the good ole days where ladies were lady like and uneducated and men make all the money, and I think she may even be racist. I met her and her husband while overhearing her doubt that I spoke English.

I always help her when she comes in and I run into her a few times during her shopping trip. She always says, " Oh YOU again? Why am I always running into you?"

"Because I run this store bitch." is what I'd like to say.
 
This is dark but funny. I'd like to say "he/she's dead" when someone asks where someone is or if they are still at the store. I would say it like Nic Cage said it in The Rock. Well, I guess it would be two different tones. When he says"they're dead" it's more shock but when he says "he's dead". I would love to quote The Rock on the walkie talkie. Shit, I'd love to quote any movie or TV show in it.
 
Jackswastedlife99 said:
This is dark but funny. I'd like to say "he/she's dead" when someone asks where someone is or if they are still at the store. I would say it like Nic Cage said it in The Rock. Well, I guess it would be two different tones. When he says"they're dead" it's more shock but when he says "he's dead". I would love to quote The Rock on the walkie talkie. Shit, I'd love to quote any movie or TV show in it.
Click to expand...

Lol, that's hilarious. But if we're going to get murderous, why not "guests first"? Seriously, some days I want to hurt people. Fast, fun, and homicidal!
 
I was just talking about saying funny things on the walkie talkie. No killing for me.
 
ZombiePanties31 said:
Jackswastedlife99 said:
This is dark but funny. I'd like to say "he/she's dead" when someone asks where someone is or if they are still at the store. I would say it like Nic Cage said it in The Rock. Well, I guess it would be two different tones. When he says"they're dead" it's more shock but when he says "he's dead". I would love to quote The Rock on the walkie talkie. Shit, I'd love to quote any movie or TV show in it.
Click to expand...

Lol, that's hilarious. But if we're going to get murderous, why not "guests first"? Seriously, some days I want to hurt people. Fast, fun, and homicidal!
Click to expand...
Fast, fun & fatal.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Users who are viewing this thread

Total: 1 (members: 0, guests: 1)
Back
Top