To that one guest

[poglet]

to whatever guest decided they didn't need that single anonymous sock, and whatever team member accepted it into the reshop bin for me to find god knows how much later -

1. why?
2. why???
3. one single solitary sock
4. why.
5. oh god was someone wearing it ew ew ew ew ewwwwwwwwwwwwww

Remind me to toss single condoms in your reshop cart.

(Someone might have "worn" them)

bye. goodbye. i am leaving the planet at the very suggestion. it was fun existing on earth but then this happened.

 

[oath2order]

To the guests driving in the parking lot: WHAT THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT DRIVE SO FAST NEXT TO ME LIKE I AM RIGHT HERE YOU CAN SEE ME. I'M BRINGING CARTS IN FOR YOU.

die.

 

[judgemental]

to that one guest who told me "learn your job" because YOU used the wrong gift card because both gift cards looked the same, why don't you learn to take responsibility for yourself. i was going to help you and tehn you started to yell at me telling me im dumb and it's my fault that you used the wrong card.... please kindly GTFO.

 

[poglet]

another one that i forgot about - to that one guest who silently glared at me while i rang up her whole load of clothes and jewelry, then sighed heavily and said "NO..." (in the tone of voice one uses with a deliberately misbehaving child)

me: what's wrong?
guest: i don't want that.
me: oh, i'm sorry, no problem. *voids the last piece of jewelry and tosses it in the reshop* alright, your total comes to-
guest: NO...
me: ... i'm sorry? is something the matter?
guest: i don't want any of that.
me: ... so you don't want any of the jewelry?
guest: right.
me: okay, no problem. *scrolls up through the register to void each piece*
guest: *reaches over my counter to try and fish the things out of her bags*
me: *swallows a scream* it's okay, i've got it.
guest: sure you do.

god, why do people always act so weird about reshop? either they're deeply apologetic (oh my god, do other stores yell at you or something? it's okay, you're safe here, i just toss it in a bin to be put back later) or they're furious at me for daring to work in a store that sells things they can't make up their minds on. and like, i get being embarrassed that you find out you can't afford something, i've been there, i think everyone has at least one moment like that. i'm not gonna mock you or yell at you, i promise. just don't expect me to read your goddamn mind.

 

[Nauzhror]

Only time it pisses me off when a guest decides to not buy something is when it's cold food.

And then it's Targets policy to toss the food that pisses me off, not the guest.

 

[Mugen]

TTOG: It seems like I always get one set of deaf guest this time of year and every year you guys are some of the nicest people despite our communication barriers. I know I probably made it awkward, but I'm glad I was able to help you guys and hopefully made your Christmas.

TTOG: Yes, it is TOTES RIDIKULUS that our mobile department is closed at 10:30 at night. I know, HOW CAN THEY EXPECT YOU TO GET THE iPHONE 5s DEAL WHEN THEY AREN'T EVEN OPEN?!?!?!? It's like you didn't have all week. :sadface:

 

[thatcashierdude]

Only time it pisses me off when a guest decides to not buy something is when it's cold food.

And then it's Targets policy to toss the food that pisses me off, not the guest.

It'll still get donated though. Unlike all the Halloween candy that overflowed from our toss bin...wish that stuff had unique barcodes and the same thing the Halloween costumes have: RETURN BY 10/31. Oh you bought too much? Boo hoo find a use for it.

 

[judgemental]

TTOG: It seems like I always get one set of deaf guest this time of year and every year you guys are some of the nicest people despite our communication barriers. I know I probably made it awkward, but I'm glad I was able to help you guys and hopefully made your Christmas.

I've had to help guests who were blind before and tehy are honestly the most sweetest people ever. I love helping guests like that because it allows me to realize that although they're blind, they still think the world is beautiful. I've had long talks with some of them about random stuff its great.

 

[Target Team Leader]

To that one rude guest demanding a physical receipt for an item that she bought online:

since when in the heck do you get a physical receipt from an online purchase? The receipt will always be emailed to you. It is not my fault that your printer is crapping out on you. You even have the audacity to call corporate because we couldn’t provide you with one. Well then, go ahead, I will not be sending one of my team members to your house to fix your darn printer!

 

[RedMan]

Ask that guest if you can have the password for her email account so that you can print one out for her in the TSC. While you're at it, ask for her Target user name and password. Surely she won't mind waiting the 45 minutes or so that it might take you, waiting for the email. And who cares if her security is compromised? Let's VIBE.

Where's that damned sarcasm font when ya need it?

 

[Nauzhror]

Only time it pisses me off when a guest decides to not buy something is when it's cold food.

And then it's Targets policy to toss the food that pisses me off, not the guest.

It'll still get donated though. Unlike all the Halloween candy that overflowed from our toss bin...wish that stuff had unique barcodes and the same thing the Halloween costumes have: RETURN BY 10/31. Oh you bought too much? Boo hoo find a use for it.

Uhh, no. Cold food never gets donated. We QMOS it on the spot and throw it in Toss.

 

[queencat]

ttog: "Merry Christmas! That's right, I say merry Christmas! I'm not politically correct." Good for you. You didn't need to tell me...or the guests behind you. No one gives a crap.

Sidebar, I hate the term politically correct. You can replace it with 'nice' or 'polite' and it means the same thing.

 

[fredonica]

TTOG: "They always let me do such and such..."

I will not blatantly disregard our Price Match policy just because other TMs or even GSTLs/GSAs do. I'm super friendly and respectful to our guests but I know how to do my job

Also...

Guest: "What's the REDCard? Is it like a club card? How do I get my 5% off?"
Meanwhile she's holding a REDCard pamphlet and temporary credit card slip. HOW DO YOU NOT REALIZE YOU JUST APPLIED FOR A DAMN CREDIT CARD????!

 

[TechChic08]

To most my guests today: LEARN TO READ THE DETAILS IN THE GIFT CARD OFFERS! It's NOT buy a three pack of the item, get a gift card. It's buy three of the same item, get a gift card. I have no sympathy for you when you piss & moan about it because the ads have been showing this stuff all month long!

TTOG: No, the ad clearly shows the regular dvd season set of Game of Thrones for $19.99. You, my dear, got the Blu Ray & Digital version. There is no way in hell anyone in this store is going to sell you that for $30 less than it's ringing up. No need to piss & moan when even the GSTL confirms this with electronics.

 

[commiecorvus]

ttog: "Merry Christmas! That's right, I say merry Christmas! I'm not politically correct." Good for you. You didn't need to tell me...or the guests behind you. No one gives a crap.

Sidebar, I hate the term politically correct. You can replace it with 'nice' or 'polite' and it means the same thing.

Thank you.

 

[Not Alex]

To basically every guest: The carts are wet because it is raining/snowing. You know that is raining because you just came in from the parking lot, so I'm not sure why you're surprised.

And no, I'm not searching for a dry one for you (unless you have a kid that has to sit in it, then I will dig one out).

 

[redeye58]

To that one guest: Pedestrians have the right of way in the parking lot; even if we're wearing red (or black) & khaki.
Running a stop sign & cutting me off just showed what a douche you were.
Hope you don't show up at my counter any time soon.

 

[thatcashierdude]

To that one guest:

The reason I put that cart there (blocking the line of carts) is so you would grab it. Not so you would move it out of the way and grab a cart from the line. After watching so many of you grab from the line instead of the ones pushed over next to the doors I blocked the lines to see if that would make you take the carts people left blocking the exit doors and you moved them to get a wet cart...why?

 

[judgemental]

To basically every guest: The carts are wet because it is raining/snowing. You know that is raining because you just came in from the parking lot, so I'm not sure why you're surprised.

And no, I'm not searching for a dry one for you (unless you have a kid that has to sit in it, then I will dig one out).

OMG it's been raining all week here and all our carts have been wet. We literally get guests complain about how everyhting is wet; cart, the belt, their stuff, everything and it's like, what do you want us to do? it's wet. deal with it. it's raining, deal with it.

 

[Mugen]

TTOG: It seems like I always get one set of deaf guest this time of year and every year you guys are some of the nicest people despite our communication barriers. I know I probably made it awkward, but I'm glad I was able to help you guys and hopefully made your Christmas.

I've had to help guests who were blind before and tehy are honestly the most sweetest people ever. I love helping guests like that because it allows me to realize that although they're blind, they still think the world is beautiful. I've had long talks with some of them about random stuff its great.

I actually had a blind guy with a great sense of humor. I was taking my break outside with backroom keys in my pocket and he was following behind me. When the security thing went off he, without hesitation, said "OOH, they found out I stole my dog" haha.

 

[StackerMistress]

To all those guests who walk right in the middle of the aisles, hunkered down on top of their carts like their spines can't support the weight of their body, walking as slowly as humanly possible, ignoring my polite requests to get around them...

I seriously hate you. How one person manages to block the entire racetrack so I can't get around them with a vehicle must be a physics-defying feat. I am going to take your ankles out with my flat.

 

[redeye58]

Right behind you with my degreaser

 

[Retail Girl]

To that one guest who accused me of being a thief: fuck off.

You found a wallet in the parking lot, good for you. So you bring it in and demand we page the person (which we don't do) when I told you we wouldn't page the person, you threw a fit, saying you wouldn't leave the wallet until we found the guest because you were convinced I would take it's contents. Seriously??? Go to hell.

 

[sher]

To the guest today who attempted to pull that standard coupon fraud bullshit with me: I have to admit, I enjoyed that the instant I started ~reading the coupons~, as well as pointing out that they don't match your items, you instantly started pulling them back off the mismatched items in the rest of your transaction and then told me you "changed your mind" on basket full of trial sized lotions. It was pretty amusing.

Further, it's likely you chose my lane because my appearance gives off an air of apathy, but I'm glad you did, because any other cashier probably would have let you slide.

I could've written this post. The couponers always come to me! I haaate cashiering so I usually look like I'm just rushing through it all when I'm up there (honestly, I am) so they assume I'll scan scan scan their coupons and just accept them all. I dislike coupon cheaters more than I dislike cashiering though. And I've had multiple couponers come in with baskets of trial sized items telling me how "the other target [they] went to yesterday" let them use those coupons for those items.

 

[TiedAndDropped]

TTOG: You are are shopping at Target, not Kmart, dumbass! Your friend isn't any better than you given that he thought he was at Wal-Mart before you 'corrected' him. Just how you all managed to get into the building in the first place is beyond me.

Overheard a guest today say to her companion "Look at the prices! This is why I don't shop here." Um... you're shopping here, aren't you?